late night promises

There is a reason sleep deprivation is used as a torture technique. It works. It's soul crushing. Government agents may think that their the experts but I'm here to tell you that the real experts are babies. Particularly of the newborn variety in the 8-10 pound meatloaf stage. These babies have an innate ability to make you pray for sleep all day long, talk about sleep to everyone you know and even dream of sleep. You know, while you're actually sleeping. They're THAT good. Babies!

Solomon is a pretty good sleeper and we know we're pretty lucky to be getting mostly four hour stretches at night. But there are times at say 2 a.m. when he's finished eating and I've put him in his crib and I go back to bed when it begins --- the grousing/grunting/whining stage that could go either way. It could turn into him passing out for about four hours or a full blown screaming fit. At these key moments I find myself to be the most humble, yet pathetic person. I have been known to stand outside his door or hide under the covers in my bed making him the most illogical promises such as: 

1. I'll give you a million dollars if you just go to sleep.

2. You can have chocolate for breakfast if you just go to sleep.

3. You can have Atticus' college fund if you just go to sleep.

4. You can watch television if you just go to sleep.

5. You can have your own guitar if you just go to sleep.

6. I'll start working out if you just go to sleep. 

7. I'll stop eating cheese if you just go to sleep.

Note: all of these seem so same at 2 a.m.