ten foods i hate

 as someone who loves food, i've been hesitant to write this post.

but as someone who loves food, it's important to understand one's palette.

some of the foods that i am about to list will be controversial.

they're very beloved by most people.

and to those of you that love these atrocities, i apologize.

but these foods are truly repugnant to me.

1. mayonnaise

i hate mayo more than any other food.
the way it smells, the way it looks, the way it tastes.
all revolting.
if a sandwich comes with it after i have ordered its removal i won't eat it.
don't believe me? ask nelzo.
he's dealt with this lovely idiosyncrasy for years.

2. baked beans

i want to like baked beans, but i just don't.
the sliminess and graininess=gag reflect.
i usually create a dam around them so they don't overflow near my tacos.

3. baked beans candy

the name says it all.
there is no way these are good.
and i refuse to try them.
ew.

4. dill

the perfect way to ruin so many otherwise good dishes.
salmon, potatoes, bread dip, etc.
its way too powerful.
you put it on anything and all you taste is dill.

5. pickles

i like cucumbers and i don't like pickles.
and yes i know pickles are cucumbers fermented.
 i don't like them.
not sweet, and obviously, not dill.

6. grapefruit

why would you ever have a grapefruit when you could have an orange?
way too tart, makes my lips pucker just thinking about them.
i know people put sugar on them, but i'm against adding sugar to fruit.
after all, fruit is nature's candy.
except grapefruit which is nature's boston baked beans.

7. lamb

my grandmother makes a lamb that looks better than this each easter and it pains me.
how can something that looks so impressive taste so gamey and chewy?
i swear i hear a very quiet baaaa when i eat my few polite bites each year.
and no, it doesn't taste like beef.

8.  marzipan

again it looks pretty, but it tastes like edible clay.
and this is not candy, nor is it a treat.
and the grosssest thing?
that people order marzipan babies for showers?
so disturbing!

9. lima beans

these are my brussel sprouts.
i.e. the vegetable 90% of the population hates
i like sprouts, especially roasted with some good olive oil and sea salt.
but lima beans cannot be improved.
i've tried adding lots of butter and salt and they still taste like lima beans.
gritty, squishy and just blah.

10. olive loaf

just looking at this picture makes me want to vom.
i refuse to justify this hate.

what foods do you hate?